Lately, I'm not at my best. Out of all the priorities I have, I'm letting my ego to control my friggin' life..
Last night, I celebrated my good-friend's bday at Jekyll and Hyde Pub in Midtown, NYC. I intensely searched for a place that fit with her interest! It was fun and all but I just felt something missing.
Last night, I celebrated my good-friend's bday at Jekyll and Hyde Pub in Midtown, NYC. I intensely searched for a place that fit with her interest! It was fun and all but I just felt something missing.
Then I realized that I'm just being ungrateful sonuvabitch at the dinner. from time to time, I like to throw surprise parties for my closest friends.. and mind you, I'm Taurus.. so we're known for liking extravagant stuff and being dramatic.
I don't want to sound cocky or conceited... but I like to give something special to my friends.. and it seems like my friends don't really know what I "want".. (GOSH, i'm such a biatch!!)
I don't want to sound cocky or conceited... but I like to give something special to my friends.. and it seems like my friends don't really know what I "want".. (GOSH, i'm such a biatch!!)
hmmm.. I know you guys might gonna hate me after I say this... but 'emmmm....
I never get the surprise party that I want.. (there you go, I said it!)
couple of years ago, I wanted something special on my B-Day but they took me to a Korean Restaurant that I hated! (well, my friends didn't know that I hate that resto..)
then, a year after that I took off to Paris for my B-Day cuz I felt that my friends here not gonna throw any surprise party anyway.. then the next year, my friends took me to a bakery shop on my b-day..because I kept nagging about surprise party, so they felt forced/sorry/pitty cuz of my attitude or something..
I never have/ feel a surprise party that really... hmmm.. I can't even put it in words..
I know I know I sound very childish and unappreciative.. but years after years.. is always the same case on my birthday.. it bugged me for years now when it comes to birthday. So from now on I try my best not to relly on others and make myself happy first...
I know I know I sound very childish and unappreciative.. but years after years.. is always the same case on my birthday.. it bugged me for years now when it comes to birthday. So from now on I try my best not to relly on others and make myself happy first...
below are places that I wanna "treat myself" for my 2010 bday:
Berlin
Brazil
Belitung
Hey you know whats funny?
ReplyDelete(lemme have my childish moment)
to be honest, i kinda felt this way this year.
But then after i consulted with my dear reliable diary book who's in jakarta, i realize that thinking like this is not gonna get me anywhere.
At the end of the day, we have to realize that life doesn't always go the way we want it to go. Yea it sucks.. but all we can do then is just be thankful for what we got and not take them for granted.
I hope you feel better now.
xoxo
and you're right..
ReplyDeletelearn to depend on yourself first before you depend on others =)